When I was younger, I used to think I had a lot of friends. But I never did. I’m just a diplomat. I get along with almost everyone. And so I have a lot of acquaintances. A big network. But that’s very different from true friends.
In fact, I think hardly anyone has more than 10 of those. The depth they require for a certain period is intense. That’s not something you can replicate dozens of times.
But I also don’t think we need to. Our lives unfold in seasons. They vary in shape and length, but in the end, there won’t be that many. If you can point to 1-2 special people for each of them, to a colorful stack of memories you share, what else do we need?
And, despite there being not many of them, these relationships do stack up. After all, you can always call them and reminisce about that time. Learn what they’re up to now. But revel for a few hours in your joint past in the trenches. Or on the beach. Or at home.
Friendship is a great reminder that the world keeps turning. That, even though it feels that way, the universe does not revolve around you.
You hang out with the dude you only quote movies with. You eat pizza with the girl who loves it as much as you do. You call an old buddy and run through inside jokes for an hour. All of this is friendship. And none of it requires lots of friends.
Let’s be grateful for the ones we have.
About Gratituesday: By Tuesday, we're deep into thinking about what we seek. That's why it's a great day to remember what we already found. Gratitude has many benefits, but, mostly, it's an exercise in shifting our perspective. Instead of focusing on what's missing, we can focus on what we have.
And we'll be much calmer for it.
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